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Now People Want To #FireColbert, Which Seems Kinda Dumb

WASHINGTON – JULY 27: Comedian Stephen Colbert waits to begin a taping for a skit at the White House July 27, 2007 in Washington, DC. Stephen Colbert, host of the news satire ‘The Colbert Report’ was at the White House for a taping of a mock press conference. (Photo by Brendan Smialowski/Getty Images)

The other night, Stephen Colbert went on national TV and directly addressed President Trump with the following joke(?): “The only thing your mouth is good for is being Vladimir Putin’s cock holster.” It was perhaps not the finest moment in the history of late-night television, or of the world. It was stupid and hateful and homophobic, and apparently it was the best his team of highly paid comedy writers could come up with. Now Colbert is hearing about it via the modern equivalent of being put in stocks in the town square: a trending Twitter hashtag.

“Late Show” host Stephen Colbert is facing backlash for a joke he made about President Donald Trump on Monday night that many are calling “homophobic…”

“Sir, you attract more skinheads than free Rogaine,” Colbert said near the end of the insult-laden rant. “You have more people marching against you than cancer. You talk like a sign language gorilla that got hit in the head. In fact, the only thing your mouth is good for is being Vladimir Putin’s c–k holster.” The final remark has drawn the internet’s ire, with viewers taking to social media to declare Colbert is homophobic. The hashtag #FireColbert began spreading around Twitter, along with calls for people to boycott sponsors of the late-night show.

Well, the “sign language gorilla” one was pretty good, at least.

Should CBS #FireColbert for this? My initial gut reaction is… #Nah. That’s pretty dumb, right? I do think he should apologize, if not to the President of the United States, at least to his late-night audience. But if he doesn’t, so what?

If Colbert wants to angrily alienate everybody who disagrees with him, fine by me. I gave up on him years ago — I remember wishing he had taken over The Daily Show when Craig Kilborn imploded, but that was a long time ago — and I don’t watch his show. I don’t pay attention to him unless he makes the news for doing something stupid. I vote with my remote. That’s how it should be. No further action need be taken.

And just on general principles, I’d prefer to keep people like Colbert out there, because I don’t want the Democrats to ever win another election in my lifetime. These guys have driven away so many undecided voters that they managed to elect Trump. Keep going, I say.

My rule of thumb is: Liberals want conservatives to shut up, and conservatives want liberals to keep talking.

Then again, if CBS does #FireColbert, I’m kinda okay with it. If Les Moonves decides Colbert is no longer worth what he’s being paid, fine. Colbert has the right to say what he wants, no matter how ugly and bigoted it is, but his employers should be able to protect their own best interests.

Nobody has the right to a network TV show. If Colbert ends up doing a podcast from behind an Ikea table like Keith Olbermann, it wouldn’t be some sort of threat to the republic.

#FireColbert, #SaveColbert, #Whatever. Late-night network TV in 2017 sucks, but it’s theirs to do with as they choose. Johnny Carson is dead, the days of appointment television are over, and we’ve got Netflix and Amazon and Hulu and Pluto TV and a zillion other ways to pass the time.

We’ll be fine either way, Stephen, but good luck with that whole deal. If this late-night thing ends up not working out, maybe you could bring back Strangers With Candy. You remember, the show where you played a gay high-school teacher who had one little pinkie-toe in the closet. You were hilarious, and you really seemed to have an affinity for the character (NTTAWWT). I’d watch that show.